Hello Loves!

We are onto the next chapter of many chapters we took on the quest to parenthood. After a really great conversation with my family doctor, who may I state was not concerned about us, we were a healthy young couple and it can normally take 12 + months to get pregnant, we were referred to a fertility specialist in our home town of Barrie.

Now going forward these stories are my own experience in the fertility world and do not reflect the industry as a whole.


After meeting with our fertility specialist, who I have to admit was not the kindest of men, he decided to do a bunch of testing to determine what our next path would be.

Sameer would go on to get his sperm tested for mobility and count, whereas I would undergo a long list of blood tests. One test being AMH.

To quote LifeLabs, AMH, the anti-müllerian hormone is a protein produced by granulosa cells in ovarian follicles. The level of AMH in the blood stream can be an indicator of fertility in women, specifically in relations to the number of eggs in reserve in the ovaries. It can also help to predict menopause and diagnosis ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome and polycystic ovary syndrome.

The Results

After I want to say, a good month or two of fretting about our results we went in to chat with our doctor. The results were that Sameer’s sperm was plentiful and full of life. Me on the other hand was given a AMH result of 1.5 (ng/ml), a normal level for my age should be around 5.4 (ng/ml). It was safe to say (at the time) that this was the answer to our problems. We were told if we wanted to have kids then we would need to start fertility treatments ASAP, as I was running out of time. I was also told that it was a possibility that this would never happen for us and we should consider donor eggs.

All My Fault

I have to admit these results were the start of my mental health deteriorating. I was so incredibly devastated. Looking at Sameer, full of sadness, I might not be able to give him the one thing he wants in this world, a child. It was all my fault. I sought the comfort of Google, desperately trying to find people whose stories had beautiful outcomes. Although none of them were ever good enough, even after reading that low AMH isn’t the be all and end all and that people do go on to conceive naturally. I just knew it wasn’t going to be so simple for us.

I was desperate to start fertility treatments. After a couple of days, falling into a really dark space, we set up our appointments to get ready for the next step. Medicated timed intercourse.

 xoxo Fil

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1 Comment

  1. September 17, 2019 / 11:08 pm

    It’s so brave of you to share this dear. I wish you and your partner all the best in your fertility journey.

    Jessica | notjessfashion.com

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